


Memory

by ZoinksSc00b



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Character Death, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Tup Shot Krell au, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 00:42:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29180460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoinksSc00b/pseuds/ZoinksSc00b
Summary: It was Tup’s death that brought them together because, whether they accepted it or not, they had loved him.
Relationships: CT-27-5555 | ARC-5555 | Fives/CT-5385 | Tup, Dogma/CT-5385 | Tup, Dogma/Fives
Comments: 7
Kudos: 26





	Memory

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this on my Tumblr a while back, but I decided to upload it here too.

It was Tup’s death that brought them together because, whether they accepted it or not, they had loved him. Of course, the change hadn’t happened immediately. There had been days, weeks even, of hoping and praying Tup hadn’t been decommissioned. Krell had been a traitor, so why wouldn't they kill the Besalisk? It made no sense to allow Tup to die after he acted in the best interest of the Republic.

Yet, Tup never came back, despite all the sleepless nights and soon-to-be broken wishes.

Blaming Dogma was so much easier than it should’ve been. The resentment had built over their time on Umbara and it had peaked with Tup’s absence. If he had just shot Krell himself instead of allowing Tup to grab the already stolen blaster, Tup would still be alive.

He had assured Dogma with searing words and a steady glare that everyone would have preferred him dying. An aruetii like him had no place among their vode and Fives would gladly do what he had hesitated to do with Krell.

Tears had streamed down Dogma’s face at the remarks and, for a second, it was effortless to fall into the illusion.

The worst thing was that his lips felt so much like Tup’s: soft yet experienced and so willing to please. His lost love’s voice begged for Fives (for Tup) to fill him up because he had been so empty since he left. He could detect the streak of tears transferring and, deep in the back of his mind, he acknowledged how Dogma was also seeing Tup.

The desire in his gaze as Fives ripped off his armor and forced him against the wall was all Fives’ cyar'ika. The way Tup’s legs wrapped around the small of his back and how he moaned out his name (Tup’s name) in a beautiful staccato were keeping Fives sane. Biting the shiny’s neck, claiming them, had left their legs trembling and grip weak. Tup whimpered as Fives ground against him. As Tup pleaded for release, eyes and breath heavy, Fives proved he could show mercy.

Waking up in his bunk with Dogma resting against his chest and no blacks to separate the layer of sweat on their skin, Fives realized he messed up. Dogma came to the same conclusion as soon as he jolted awake, fear evident in every quiver of his body as he begged for Fives to forget the night before. He promised to leave.

For good.

Fives wiped off his tears. Not out of charity but so Dogma would stop looking like the person he most wished to see (or, at least, that is what he told himself).

He wouldn't admit it, but he somewhat enjoyed having Dogma around after the incident. They had agreed not to talk about the brief indulgences, but the rest of the company was noticing how close they had gotten.

Kix had even said that Dogma and he were good for each other, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Dogma hated himself because of Fives and Fives couldn’t bring himself to care.

It wasn’t like Fives had begun opening up and joking for the first time in weeks. It wasn’t like he had watched Dogma softly laugh with complete awe. It wasn’t like he had held Dogma in his arms as he mourned the loss of his batchmate. It wasn’t like he was trying to make up for what he had said and it wasn’t like he knew there was no way of doing that no matter how hard he tried.

It wasn’t like he was starting to kiss Dogma instead of Tup.


End file.
